first kiss? first crush? first love? first hip replacement?

I remember being 22 and being frustrated and disappointed. I'd been with my boyfriend for almost a year and he was not really wanting to make our time together anything more than "just fun". I was ready for moving in together, love, engagement-- the whole enchilada. He was more than content to just date recreationally (only me but not wanting to make it "official and binding" in any way). Meanwhile all of my fellow students and co-workers (or so it seemed) were busy getting engaged, having babies and settling down. Even my sister (six years younger!!) was talking marriage with her boyfriend (and had been with the boy before too!). I was thinking that i'd missed the boat and was going to be one of those women that just never married.

Clearly, i was wrong as i've been with Joe now for over twenty years.

I was sooooooo excited when we got engaged-- planning the wedding and honeymoon. Planning our first apartment then first house together. Hoping for a baby to make our famliy complete (or at least more complete).

I then remember being "the only one" not having babies. We tried for what seemed like forever (six months) to get pregnant and just nothing was working. Frustrated that my body, which had always done for me what i'd asked of it, wouldn't "toe the line". We did, of course, end up figuring it out and had the two kids that we'd always wanted. First a girl then a boy, just like i'd always hoped.

So, the perfect little life, eh?

So.........now what?

No more "firsts" to look forward to on the horizon. Big fancy wedding, fun honeymoon, first holidays together, first apartment, first home purchased together, first daughter, first son, first move out of hometown (and the many that followed), landmark anniversaries. Fun firsts.

Now i just see the "less-than-fun" firsts ahead of us. First kid driving and more independent. First kid off to college. First week with no kids at home. Retirement. First orthopedic trouble (broken hip, knee replacement, impaired mobility). Woohoo.

My colleagues are now getting engaged (two this past weekend!) and having babies. I'm in the "i remember those days" role as it's been quite a while since i was in either position. I'm closer to my kids having those events than my having them. Even my mom-in-law is getting married (although i'm pretty sure that she won't be having babies....).

Off to think of a "fun first" for me and Joe. There's gotta be something out there better than being a Wal-Mart greeter on one of those motorized wheelie-thingies. :o)