i almost forgot your recipe for the day...i had promised you a recipe with each posting, don't cha know?!

LISI'S A LUSH LENTILS (yes, i am an alliteration slut)>>>>>>>1 cup dry lentils (green/brown, not red)>>>>>>>2 cups red wine (better with 1C wine and 1C water)>>>>>>>1 onion, sliced fine>>>>>>>bring to boil and simmer for 12 minutes, until lentils have absorbed the liquid and are soft but not mushy>>>>>>>add salt/pepper to taste and serve over steamed rice with lots of sour cream/sauteed onion topping.>>>>>>>also good with shredded carrot tossed in with the lentils to cook>>>the alcohol cooks away....good use for that leftover wine from making tomato sauce or from a night during which one didn't finish the bottle of wine.....i toss it in the freezer so that i can make this another day when the pantry is bare and i am too lazy to go to the grocery......we always have lentils and carrots in the house and this is good vegetarian "comfort food".

broken! kaput! jang! verklempt!

You. Are. Broken.>>>>>>>Yes, you.>>>>>>>And it makes me so happy to realize this.>>>> Now, before you stop reading, grant me a moment to explain and see if you don't agree with my line of thinking.>>>>>>>Each one of us has something broken, some way that we are not "perfect" in our own eyes or those of others. It's like that picture i saw on Facebook one time. It was a perfect red apple, shiny and clear, round and appetizing. Perfect.......until it was turned and one could see that the other side of this same apple was marred with a slimy worm hole and brown/damaged spot. The "perfect" apple was not so "perfect" but the side that it showed was.>>>>>>>That's just like us, right? The side that we show to others is not always the whole story. The side that you see isn't the whole story...and that is so refreshing to me.>>>>>>>I have a friend (no names!) who was very successful in the business world....but who raised her kids to be dependent and needy. She is still supporting them well into her own retirement, to her own detriment and theirs. She is supporting and caring for "the kids" (who are in their 30's) to such an extent that they are unable to do for themselves. Like the butterfly that was helped out of its cocooon and thus never developed its wings, these adults (!) are unable to function as such. They are stunted at about developmental age of 13.>>>>>>>I have another person that i know here locally that, although retired and no longer in the working world of demands, is so stressed that she needs daily marijuana and alcohol to calm enough to function during the day and sleep at night. She tried "Dry January" and lasted two days. She just cannot cope with her everyday life without the crutch of the "medications".>>>>>>>I have sosososo many ways in which i am SO broken but thought that i was the only one. I saw so many of my beautiful friends (Tracy!Beth!Amy!Erin!) and how they are SLAYING life and how little i am doing in comparison. I KNOW that i am broken but failed to see how each of us has their own brokeness, individual to each of us but still present.>>>>>>>While i wish for healing and ease for all of my friends (i really do!), it is reassuring that i am not the only one who wishes that _something_ was different about my life, my progress, my "craziness". That i'm not the only one who would sosososo love to have those "three magic wishes" from a fairy godmother or magic Aladdin's lamp. Could i change some of the deficiencies in myself and my life? Yes. Would it take work and change and discomfort? Also, yes. Am i willing to do so? Well.....i say yes but there has been 10+ years that i've been saying"TODAY i am going to change xyz!!"....and yet here we are, in the same place.>>>>>>>> Again.>>>>>>>>Then i see my friend Suzanne who is making BIG CHANGES in her life, changing her mindset. Changing her diet and exercise. Changing her body and her mindset.>>>>>>>Is she an inspiration? Yes. Should this be enough to get me off my duff and making the changes that i KNOW that i need to make? Also yes. Will i do that...? Hmmmmm. In the words of my then-three year old son (who is now the father of an almost 3 year old)...."not today, maybe tomorrow".>>>>>>> That said, i have heard that if we all put our troubles and concerns in a big pile and then got to choose to take back the same number, we would all choose the ones that we brought, not wanting the troubles of others>>>>>>>I'm not so sure about that but it's likely true. The more that i get to know others, the more i see that my troubles, concerns, and worries are normal (well, not completely out of the range of normal...i'm pretty quirky and broken!) compared to those of others. And this is somewhat comforting.>>>>>>>So, take your pot brownies and Pabst Blue Ribbon....wear your lucky socks to work every Monday on your way to the Starbucks for the double mocccachino that gets you through the morning....watch "repeat/comfort television" (a show that you've watched before but makes you feel good...Friends for one of my favorite people) in your jammies.....nap on the floor with your doggies in the middle of the afternoon when life is just tootootoo much for you to deal with....whatevert makes you feel better and doesn't harm others...And take heart that, no matter how "broken" you are, your good friend Lisa is SOSOSOSO MUCH more so. You may feel bad....but your "craziness" pales in comparison to mine. So see? You're not so broken...and if you are, that's coolio, that just means that i'm in good company!!>>>>>>>xoxoxo- :-x [p.s. see next posting for story of JANG]

HYGGE>>>>>>>

When we were looking for where to move for Joe's retirement, he made a list. We knew that we were wanting to move internationally, to leave the United States behind and try a new culture, new way of life. His first choice was Denmark but Costa Rica was also rated quite high. There were some key factors in our choosing Costa Rica over his preferred Denmark, even though the language barrier was a stumbling block (everyone in Denmark speaks English...everyone!). We chose Costa Rica in large part for the weather but also, a close second, because of its proximity to the US and ease of visitation for family and friends. This would allow us to share the joy of living in paradise with our favorite people.>>>>>>>One of the key things that was tempting about Denmark, however, was the Scandinavian practice of HYGGE. We live in Costa Rica (soso much warmer than Denmark and Norway!) but have incorporated this practice into our lives.>>>>>>>HYGGE (hoo-ga) is coziness, warmth, comfort. Think warm fluffy blankets on a couch, snuggled with a mug of tea or hot cocoa and a book, looking out the window, past the lit candles, to the pristine snow across the backyard, just outside your window. HYGGE.>>>>>>>How do we replicate that here in Atenas, where it is currently 85 degrees in January? Snuggly blankets and hot tea/cakes in the evening when it's cooler. Lots of pillows on couches inside and out to read, midday. Big/warm meal at midday (outside) to watch the wildlife and be immersed in nature. Candles and incense frequently (more Joe than me...i think that they smell like burnt perfume). Lots of stews and soups and "comfort food" (bolognese fettucine today, after i finish this posting!). And FIKA!>>>>>>>FIKA is another Scandivian practice that we have adopted and subscribe to _religiously_. Each day at 3:00, we stop our day....have coffee/tea and cookies/cake/treats...and play a board game. Our time to be together, enjoy our company and games and treats. It is a wonderful tradition that we started many years ago in New Mexico before our move and have shared with many others. >>>>>>>Would you like to come be Scandinavian too? Pop me a line and we can chat about the joys of HYGGE/FIKA. We have the best of both worlds....Scandinavian calm and comfort in a tropical location....toucans instead of trolls!

JACK SPRAT GINGERBREAD

THIS LOOKS GOOD BUT I HAVE _NO_ ACCESS TO OJ CONCENTRATE.....>>>>> 1-1/2 C honey>>>>>>>1/3C defrosted OJ concentrate>>>>>>>1t vanilla>>>>>>>4 egg whites (or 2 eggs, live dangerously!)>>>>>>>1/2C applesauce>>>>>>>1/4C baby food prune or apple puree>>>>>>>1/2 C each raisins and dates>>>>>>>1-1/4C flour>>>>>>3/4 C whole wheat flour (or oat flour/ground oatmeal or just more plain flour)>>>>>>>1/2T baking soda and cream of tartar>>>>>>>2t ground dried ginger>>>>>>>1/2T cinnamon>>>>>>>>dash nutmeg (good but not necessary-- don't buy for this dash!)>>>>>>>preheat oven to 325 and spray a 9" round pan with non-stick spray, set aside>>>>>>>mix wet ingredients>>>>mix dry ingredients>>>>>>>mix wet into dry ingredients until just blended (overbeating => tough gingerbread!)>>>>>>>spread batter into prepared pan and bake at 325 for 40-45 minutes>>>>>>>let cool on rack (stove burner turned off works) for 10 minutes or more before slicing and serving, preferrably warm...(can nuke lightly or in toaster-oven when serving the next day or later that day)

seasons

Life is a series of seasons, it seems to me. After being a child, with all its phases of development and milestones, adult life is no less dividided and classified. There are many sesons to adulthood.>>>>>>>I remember when i got married. I had only ever beem to one wedding before mine (friends of my then-boyfriend that i had never met before or have seen since). In the following five years, though, many of my acquaintainces, friends, and colleagues were getting married. Then, in the following years, we were all having babies and buying houses and starting careers. It was an eventful and exciting time. Time flew past with all the activities and changes.>>>>>>> Then came the season of forming families and raising children. We did that in a big way with the two kids, big house, Santa and tooth fairy, Winnie-the-Pooh and Rescue Heroes, birthday parties and Wyandotte Lake memberships.>>>>>>> That was a good season which i was able to fully enjoy, being a "stay-at-home" maman for ten years in Maryland and then Ohio. I would not have changed a thing. No, not a singel day. Were there some less-than-perfect times? Yeppers. But sososo many more good times, good days, good memories.>>>>>>> Then the kiddos become big adults and move on to their own lives. The job long abandonned to be the maman returns but it wasn't a career, more a side-income and way to fill the days productively. Joe, having developed his career all the way along was at the peak of his professional life. I, having been a "career mommy", was winding down my career and working my "side gig" as a nurse. There were some bright moments but the season was a bit less bright and certainly less active.>>>>>>>The season that follows? Retirement and "coupledom". The "kids" from my career as a maman are fully in their adult lives. The eldest older than i was when she was born. The younger married and father of two children of his own. Both working full-time and "adulting". Both having formed their own families, far from where we live. We see them a few times a year but it's not the same as when they were little and in the same house. We are "guests " in each other's lives, not the externsions of each other that we were when they were our primary family members. No one crawls into my lap to read Robert Munsch books with a sippy cup of milk.>>>>>>>And, there are no more weddings or new babies among our friends and acquaiintances. Nope, now there are occasional new grandbaby announcements but more frequently (at least this year), deaths and funerals.>>>>>>>We have lived in Costa Rica for five years and in that time, have had over ten deaths to those to whom we were close friends and family. I just was alerted to one yesterday, a dear, dear woman that i was close to in Albuquerque before our move. I was not able to see her in the visits over the last year and i just heard yesterday from her husband that she died in her sleep in October.>>>>>>>I am trying to see the "happy, happy....joy, joy" in this season of life but it's rather dim. What is there to look forward to? What "new" is on the horizon? What advantage to forming friendships and relationships with new people here (most over 70 because few retire in their 50's...) if they are just going to die soon and make us all sad? My best buddy here in Costa Rica has a husband that is 80 years old. I have friends that i keep up with in NM that are over 70 and, while healthy now, so were my friends Margaret and John here in Costa Rica that passed. Then again, social isolation is as bad for the health as smoking three packs of cigarettes a day, according to the Mayo Clinic. So...i continue to meet new people, form bonds, and hope for the best.>>>>>>>That said, if you have some happy news...a wedding or new baby/grandbaby.....a fantastic anything...i would love to share in your joy!!

suzi shared this with me...and it's too good not to share with you!!

Invisible Mom:>>>>>>> It all began to make sense, the blank stares, the lack of response, the way one of the kids will walk into the room while I'm on the phone and ask to be taken to the store. Inside I'm thinking, 'Can't you see I'm on the phone?' >>>>>>> Obviously not; no one can see if I'm on the phone, or cooking, or sweeping the floor, or even standing on my head in the corner because no one can see me at all. I'm invisible. The invisible Mom. Some days I am only a pair of hands, nothing more! Can you fix this? Can you tie this? Can you open this??>>>>>>> Some days I'm not a pair of hands; I'm not even a human being. I'm a clock to ask, 'What time is it?' I'm a satellite guide to answer, 'What number is the Disney Channel?' I'm a car to order, 'Right around 5:30, please.'>>>>>>> Some days I'm a crystal ball: 'Where's my other sock? Where's my phone? What's for dinner?'>>>>>>> I was certain that these were the hands that once held books and the eyes that studied history, music and literature--but now, they had disappeared into the peanut butter, never to be seen again. She's going, she's going, she's gone! >>>>>>> One night, a group of us were having dinner, celebrating the return of a friend from England. She had just gotten back from a fabulous trip, and she was going on and on about the hotel she stayed in. I was sitting there, looking around at the others all put together so well. It was hard not to compare and feel sorry for myself. I was feeling pretty pathetic, when she turned to me with a beautifully wrapped package, and said, 'I brought you this.' It was a book on the great cathedrals of Europe. I wasn't exactly sure why she'd given it to me until I read her inscription: 'With admiration for the greatness of what you are building when no one sees.' >>>>>>> In the days ahead I would read - no, devour - the book. And I would discover what would become for me, four life-changing truths, after which I could pattern my work: 1) No one can say who built the great cathedrals--we have no record of their names. 2) These builders gave their whole lives for a work they would never see finished. 3) They made great sacrifices and expected no credit. 4) The passion of their building was fueled by their faith that the eyes of God saw everything.>>>>>>> A story of legend in the book told of a rich man who came to visit the cathedral while it was being built, and he saw a workman carving a tiny bird on the inside of a beam. He was puzzled and asked the man, 'Why are you spending so much time carving that bird into a beam that will be covered by the roof, No one will ever see it And the workman replied, 'Because God sees.' >>>>>>> I closed the book, feeling the missing piece fall into place. It was almost as if I heard God whispering to me, "I see you. I see the sacrifices you make every day, even when no one around you does.">>>>>>> No act of kindness you've done, no sequin you've sewn on, no cupcake you've baked, no Cub Scout meeting, no last minute errand is too small for me to notice and smile over. You are building a great cathedral, but you can't see right now what it will become.>>>>>>> I keep the right perspective when I see myself as a great builder. As one of the people who show up at a job that they will never see finished, to work on something that their name will never be on. The writer of the book went so far as to say that no cathedrals could ever be built in our lifetime because there are so few people willing to sacrifice to that degree.>>>>>>> When I really think about it, I don't want my son to tell the friend he's bringing home from college for Thanksgiving, "My Mom gets up at 4 in the morning and bakes homemade pies, and then she hand bastes a turkey for three hours and presses all the linens for the table." That would mean I'd built a monument to myself. I just want him to want to come home. And then, if there is anything more to say to his friend, he'd say, "You're gonna love it there...">>>>>>> As mothers, we are building great cathedrals. We cannot be seen if we're doing it right. And one day, it is very possible that the world will marvel, not only at what we have built, but at the beauty that has been added to the world by the sacrifices of invisible mothers.>>>>>>> The Will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you. >>>>>>>

i wanna be Megan..... or NIgella....

When i was in high school (Turpin High School in Cincinnati, OH, go Spartans!), i had a classmate named Megan Kessler. Megan was (is! i looked her up on Facebook again today) everything that i wanted to be. She was beautiful with long curly thick honey colored hair. She had real Izod shirts and Pappagallo sweaters and skirts/pants. She was very smart (in all my college AP classes) and got good grades. She had Marcy Tailor as a best friend (also a smart chick with great clothes and social graces). She had lots of friend and was really popular with everyone.>>>>>>> And she had great, looping, graceful handwriting.>>>>>>> Those of you who know me best know that my handwriting is just abysmal.>>>>>>>>> As i couldn't do anything about my hair to make it fluffy and thick and curly like hers and didn't have the wardrobe that she did, i tried the only other thing that i could. I tried to write just like her.>>>>>>> When i couldn't make my handwriting like hers, i thought (i was silly even more so then...) that it must be the pens/pencils that she uses. I tried buying the same ones but couldn't find them. So....i "borrowed" one of her pens and never returned it. This didn't work. So, i took one of her pencils. Nope, that didn't work either. My handwriting stayed chickenscratch and my hair never stayed fluffy.>>>>>>> Imitation may be the sincerest form of flattery but i failed miserably.>>>>>>> She went on to college and med school and became an obstetrician with great success and admiration from all. She even did a rotation in her training at University Hospital of Cincinnati (and had my then-boyfriend/now husband as a supervising resident!) when i was working there as a nursing student. She didn't recognize me and i didn't push it. She married a physician and had two beatiful, successful children who have also gone on to finish college and to successful careers. She still has the fluffy honey colored hair but i cannot speak for the curly, graceful handwriting.>>>>>>> I am now no longer working in the medical field, staying at home in Costa Rica and being a "ama de casa" (housewife/home maker). I cannot be Nigella Lawson but in imitating her recipe, i can pretend, if only for a meal, to be the graceful, accomplished chef that she is. Now, you can too as i've included the recipe of hers that i made today. It was a success (yay, me!) and i didn't have to steal her pen and pencil to do it.>>>>>>> NIGELLA LAWSON JAMMY EGGS>>>>>>> Sometimes, it's the end of the shopping week and you don't have much in the fridge. Or it's the end of the week and you need some comfort food but don't want to work too hard to get it. And you cannot take another meal of take-away. Nor can you even think of going to the store for anything. Make this recipe, while wearing your comfy pjs, and be happy for your chance to be just a wee bit like Nigella.>>>>>>> 2T butter (or oil or not)...... 1-1/2-2 tomatoes....... 1-1/2 T tomato paste....... 1/2 t sugar....... 1/2 t salt....... 2 eggs, beaten....... (garlic butter)...... baguette....... cheese of choice (see note)....... chop the tomatoes to smallish pieces and put in saucepan with butter, cook over medium heat (i covered to speed the cooking process), add a bit of water if it starts to stick, saute until tomatoes start to break down, stirring now and then....... add tomato paste, salt/sugar and give it a good stir....... beat eggs again...... put sliced baguette in toaster and begin to brown....... meanwhile, dump the beaten eggs into the tomato melange and give it a good stir to combine, continue to stir as the egg cooks, stopping before it gets to the "doneness" that you desire as the eggs will continue to cook....... butter that toasted baguette with the garlic butter (or regular butter or none at all)....... top with all of the jammy eggs....... sprinkle feta (i did this) or fresh parmesan or mozzarella cheese on top....... you will have tomato paste left over. toss the rest of the can (covered in saran)in the freezer for the next time you need comfort Jammy Eggs (or in the fridge if you think that this might be sooner rather than later.... i won't judge)........ Hubster loved this and it could scarcely be easier. Now, if i could only get Megan Kessler's favorite recipe..... i may have to hit her up on Facebook! Stay tuned....!!!!