i almost forgot your recipe for the day...i had promised you a recipe with each posting, don't cha know?!

LISI'S A LUSH LENTILS (yes, i am an alliteration slut)>>>>>>>1 cup dry lentils (green/brown, not red)>>>>>>>2 cups red wine (better with 1C wine and 1C water)>>>>>>>1 onion, sliced fine>>>>>>>bring to boil and simmer for 12 minutes, until lentils have absorbed the liquid and are soft but not mushy>>>>>>>add salt/pepper to taste and serve over steamed rice with lots of sour cream/sauteed onion topping.>>>>>>>also good with shredded carrot tossed in with the lentils to cook>>>the alcohol cooks away....good use for that leftover wine from making tomato sauce or from a night during which one didn't finish the bottle of wine.....i toss it in the freezer so that i can make this another day when the pantry is bare and i am too lazy to go to the grocery......we always have lentils and carrots in the house and this is good vegetarian "comfort food".

broken! kaput! jang! verklempt!

You. Are. Broken.>>>>>>>Yes, you.>>>>>>>And it makes me so happy to realize this.>>>> Now, before you stop reading, grant me a moment to explain and see if you don't agree with my line of thinking.>>>>>>>Each one of us has something broken, some way that we are not "perfect" in our own eyes or those of others. It's like that picture i saw on Facebook one time. It was a perfect red apple, shiny and clear, round and appetizing. Perfect.......until it was turned and one could see that the other side of this same apple was marred with a slimy worm hole and brown/damaged spot. The "perfect" apple was not so "perfect" but the side that it showed was.>>>>>>>That's just like us, right? The side that we show to others is not always the whole story. The side that you see isn't the whole story...and that is so refreshing to me.>>>>>>>I have a friend (no names!) who was very successful in the business world....but who raised her kids to be dependent and needy. She is still supporting them well into her own retirement, to her own detriment and theirs. She is supporting and caring for "the kids" (who are in their 30's) to such an extent that they are unable to do for themselves. Like the butterfly that was helped out of its cocooon and thus never developed its wings, these adults (!) are unable to function as such. They are stunted at about developmental age of 13.>>>>>>>I have another person that i know here locally that, although retired and no longer in the working world of demands, is so stressed that she needs daily marijuana and alcohol to calm enough to function during the day and sleep at night. She tried "Dry January" and lasted two days. She just cannot cope with her everyday life without the crutch of the "medications".>>>>>>>I have sosososo many ways in which i am SO broken but thought that i was the only one. I saw so many of my beautiful friends (Tracy!Beth!Amy!Erin!) and how they are SLAYING life and how little i am doing in comparison. I KNOW that i am broken but failed to see how each of us has their own brokeness, individual to each of us but still present.>>>>>>>While i wish for healing and ease for all of my friends (i really do!), it is reassuring that i am not the only one who wishes that _something_ was different about my life, my progress, my "craziness". That i'm not the only one who would sosososo love to have those "three magic wishes" from a fairy godmother or magic Aladdin's lamp. Could i change some of the deficiencies in myself and my life? Yes. Would it take work and change and discomfort? Also, yes. Am i willing to do so? Well.....i say yes but there has been 10+ years that i've been saying"TODAY i am going to change xyz!!"....and yet here we are, in the same place.>>>>>>>> Again.>>>>>>>>Then i see my friend Suzanne who is making BIG CHANGES in her life, changing her mindset. Changing her diet and exercise. Changing her body and her mindset.>>>>>>>Is she an inspiration? Yes. Should this be enough to get me off my duff and making the changes that i KNOW that i need to make? Also yes. Will i do that...? Hmmmmm. In the words of my then-three year old son (who is now the father of an almost 3 year old)...."not today, maybe tomorrow".>>>>>>> That said, i have heard that if we all put our troubles and concerns in a big pile and then got to choose to take back the same number, we would all choose the ones that we brought, not wanting the troubles of others>>>>>>>I'm not so sure about that but it's likely true. The more that i get to know others, the more i see that my troubles, concerns, and worries are normal (well, not completely out of the range of normal...i'm pretty quirky and broken!) compared to those of others. And this is somewhat comforting.>>>>>>>So, take your pot brownies and Pabst Blue Ribbon....wear your lucky socks to work every Monday on your way to the Starbucks for the double mocccachino that gets you through the morning....watch "repeat/comfort television" (a show that you've watched before but makes you feel good...Friends for one of my favorite people) in your jammies.....nap on the floor with your doggies in the middle of the afternoon when life is just tootootoo much for you to deal with....whatevert makes you feel better and doesn't harm others...And take heart that, no matter how "broken" you are, your good friend Lisa is SOSOSOSO MUCH more so. You may feel bad....but your "craziness" pales in comparison to mine. So see? You're not so broken...and if you are, that's coolio, that just means that i'm in good company!!>>>>>>>xoxoxo- :-x [p.s. see next posting for story of JANG]